This is it: A Short Story

This is it. This is the big one. It’s  now or never. Pass or fail. The end of the line, so to speak. The moment where my life will either end, or begin. Oh god. This moment will decide everything. I’ve always been told to live in the moment, and this moment is saying “what are you doing? Run! You can’t put your future on the line for this.” But I can’t run. That’s not an option; I’ve run too many times before and I promised myself– actually I promised more than myself, I promised her– that I would face the charging bull with a brave face.

Anyway, what could go wrong, really? I’ve been preparing for this for months now. I’ve studied the books; I know the drill. I mean, how hard could it be? It’s just a test, so to speak.

Quietly I repeat under my breath, “I can do this. I can win. I can do this,” as I stand in front of the double doors. Behind those doors lies a world that I never dreamed of having access too. Until now. This is my one, and only chance. If I lose this… Than I’m back to where I was, and I promised I would never go back there again. Through the doors now, down the hall to the left. Just following signs, simple really, if my knees weren’t trying to imitate a drum solo by knocking together and the butterflies in my stomach weren’t morphing into several agitated swallows.

Here it is. The door was rather plain and white, just a normal door, except for a piece of paper taped to it with four neatly cut strips of scotch tape. In simple, black font was typed the words “Auditions. Today: 10 AM- 4 PM”.

The audition was for a major new show. Prime time, the works. Inside, I know I shouldn’t be aiming this high, that I should just work my way up, but to act has always been my dream, and I didn’t have the time, or money, to waste on climbing a ladder that could be… circumvented. Open auditions are notoriously difficult, but sometimes they find promising new stars, hopefully like me. But I’m at a distinct disadvantage. I should explain that I have never taken an acting class in my life. All I have are some minor roles in school plays and what I read in books. I thought back to what my dad had told me this morning, “All those spoiled rich brats in there are twice as talented and a better trained than you. You don’t stand a chance. Even if you happen to have more talent, which I severely doubt, they’ll just buy the part right out from under you.”

Such wonderful words of encouragement. I would say that he wasn’t having a good morning, but he never has a good morning… never has a good anything for that matter. Well, now’s the time to prove him wrong because I have something that none of those “spoiled rich brats” in there have. I have real life experience in acting. I can bluff my way around a poker table like the masters. And I’ve been helping my dad with his ‘business’ for years now. Yeah, conning people might be illegal, but the best way to become a better actor is to act under pressure, like when your life is in danger. But, as I said before, I never want to go back to that life. No. I’m going to win this and get out of that stinking old house forever. I promised my grandma, before she died, that I would get out and succeed. Now all I have to do is open the door, hand them my slip for a 12 o’clock appointment, and blow them away.

I reached for the handle and pulled the door toward me. As it opened, it seemed that a golden aura shone out. I was momentarily blinded by the brilliance, but I stumbled forward just as a voice said, “Where’s the 12 o’clock?”

This is it.

-so what do you think? leave your thoughts in the comments below!

Published in: on July 14, 2011 at 5:07 pm  Leave a Comment  

So now I’m back…

bizarally because of a 12 year old… My summer job is as a counselor at summer camps at my school. This week I was assigned to work at a “Creative Writing” camp. At first i was extremely doubtful… I’m not much of a writer, at least not any more, but there’s a girl in the camp who has a blog ( check it out). She posts a ton, nearly one hundred in two years… and yet I’ve had this one 3 and only have 4 posts. It’s quite sad. When did I get so busy that I stopped writing?

And I should say that normally people having more commitment to something doesn’t bother me (I’m not that competitive), but this week I actually wrote something outside of class for the first time in about a  year. That’s when I realized that maybe I should write more, and Lynne (the girl, fyi) inspired me.

Also, a shout out to my dad who has been bothering me for years now to write more. This is for you. ❤

Published in: on July 13, 2011 at 7:18 pm  Leave a Comment  

The Confusing State of the World


What has this world come down to when you can get spam COMMENTS? I thought it was limited to email, but apparently not! Apparently, Word Press allows people to submit comments that make no sense, and probably put a virus on your computer if you accept them.


Anyway, the state of the world is at the moment confused. For a lot of people this confusion is stemming from Obama. I don’t think anyone is really certain whether he is the good guy anymore. I think that when the people who supported him during his campaign turn on the radio now a days they cover their ears and sing the “I can’t hear you song” that we all know from childhood. Many people have a saint impression of him, and so can’t face the truth that he has: the toughest problems to face in a long time, more pressure on him than before, and the toughest circumstances. N. Korea threatening in Asia, the Middle East a confusing jungle (desert) of killers and citizens (who can tell the difference?), and the congress at each other’s throats over a health care plan that might destroy us or help us. I’ve always said that we should be setting our own problems straight, before we go meddling with others, but maybe this isn’t the best time for healthcare. Or maybe it’s a diversion, because isn’t some stupid healthcare plan a lot less scary terrorists?


Now that everyone has access to everyone else, via the internet, they are being very verbal about their facts, opinions, and comments. It’s like a giant gossip circle, which I am proudly a part. But, now that everyone has become a politician, can you imagine trying to be a real one in that environment? Everyone saying “You should do this” or “You should do that”. Even the media is one big verbal blog. It’s not actually real reporting anymore, it’s more a commentary on what they “gathered” through “reporting”. But it makes sense, reporting doesn’t make money; facts don’t make money, because you can’t get people watching with facts (apparently). But gossip can make money. This situation surprises me for two reasons. First, I’m naive, and second, wouldn’t you get a wider base of viewers with plain facts and no drama? Yes, Fox gets their republican viewers, and, yes, MSNBC, gets their dems, but what if a channel had just fact? Wouldn’t both sides want to watch it? I would anyway! But now that I think about it, it is hard to imagine a news show without their drama, quirky headlines, and pretty faces. It’s hard to imagine that world in real life. But, coming back to the net, that is one of the good things about normal people talking about real issues, you get the reality. Still, it must be stressful being a politician. Now, you have to deal with the inner and outer ring of gossip and suggestions.


Recently, Obama asked the public to be “patient” about the economy. But people won’t be patient, they want their problems fixed and you promised to fix them. People in real life focus on what is happening and what could happen to themselves, children, parents, and friends, and some can take it personally if the government is not focusing on them, because isn’t that their job? Yes, actually, it is to be for the people and by the people, but ‘the people’ isn’t ‘a person’ they have to help and please the majority. If you really think about it, isn’t that what Obama is doing with his “I won’t tax anyone making less than 250,000” plan? The people making that much money is the minority, so the majority is happy, and is not sympathetic to those making more money than them.


Published in: on September 14, 2009 at 12:17 am  Leave a Comment  

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Published in: on March 23, 2009 at 9:31 pm  Leave a Comment